Saturday the 21st was my actual due date. I woke up that day not feeling very well at all, and continued to feel that way through out the day and even had what i thought were a few small contractions. Up until that day i hadn't really felt any different. No contractions, not even very uncomfortable, which i guess is nice, but also a little frustrating. I felt like i had done my time, so where was my baby? haha! So i was actually kind of happy i was having a few symptoms. Sunday i felt normal, then monday rolled around and i definitely knew i was having contractions. I had a doctors apt. that morning and i was sure that when i went he would tell me i could go to the hospital and have my baby. I arrived at the office only to be told my apt wasn't until the next day. As soon as i got in my car i burst into tears. haha! so dramatic! I had just been waiting all weekend for my apt. and to be told i had to wait one more day was horrible! haha! Matt came to my work for a little bit then we went to lunch and i was having contractions the whole time. i had been leaking fluid all day, but didn't really think any thing of it, since being pregnant i felt like i was always leaking. I did have a little bit of bloody show which i've read is a sign of labor, so i didn't really think too much about it. I went home and took Scout on a walk and was still having them. When i got back i laid down for a little bit to see if they would go away. They didn't. They also started to get pretty painful, but they were still 7-10 minutes apart. I called Summer and she told me not to go to the hospital until they were 2 minutes apart and they were so painful that i couldn't talk through them. We had invited some friends over that night to watch the jazz game and i thought to myself a few times if i should tell them not to come, but it actually turned out to be a great distraction.
That night i was still feeling them pretty good. We went to bed and matt told me to wake him up if we needed to go to the hospital. I had a doctors appointment the next morning and 9 and felt confident that i could make it until then. I fell asleep for probably 2 hours and then my contractions really started to come on strong. I would sit on a bouncy ball or try and walk around, got in the bath probably 3 times trying to do anything to ease the pain. I didn't really know what contractions would feel like.. but let me tell you, they are no joke!! They really hurt! haha! by about 3:30 i was timing them and they were coming about every 3-4 minutes. Then by about 5 they were definitely coming every 2 minutes. i went into the bedroom and was standing on the side of the bed basically in tears as another contraction came on strong. Matt asked me if we needed to go and i said that we had better. He seriously jumped out of bed so fast haha, got dressed and got everything loaded in the car. The whole time over there i was like they better not send me home! haha! i could tell matt was excited, he was like, "this is the day we might have our baby!"
We got to the hospital around 5:45 and i told them i thought i was in labor so they took me in to a room, i got changed and they got me all hooked up to a monitor. She checked me and said i was about a 2 1/2. at my last 3 appointments i had only been at a 1 so i was excited! haha she told me my contractions were about 5 minutes apart and they like them to be more around 2 minutes apart. I was like oh great.. now they slow down! But she said they would come back and check me in an hour to see if i had progressed. After that they really started coming on faster and stronger, and i felt it mostly in my back. They had me pretty much sitting up and matt would push on my knees as hard as he could when i would have a contraction. After about 30 minutes the nurse came back in and said my contractions were 2 minutes apart, but lets wait 15 more minutes if you can to be checked. I said i could. (but in my head i was like just give me the freaking epidural! haha) She also told me that i was leaking a lot of fluid and it was possible my water had already broken. She came back in 15 minutes later to check me and said i was at a 4 and that i could be admitted!! seriously one of the happiest moments of my life! haha! Me and matt were so so excited! it was such a surreal moment to know that we were for sure going to have our baby that day! I think we may have even high fived! haha!
^after i got my epidural loving life!
They took me into another room and asked me if i wanted my epidural right away and i was like YES! haha! Honestly all it felt like was a little pinch, it seriously didn't hurt at all! After that i was in heaven!! Freaking miracle drug!! haha!! Doctor Jones was the doctor on call that day. i think he was the only doctor from the practice that i hadn't met, but he seem perfectly nice. He told me he would be in and out through out the day. I hung out for a little bit and they decided to put me on some pitocin so see if that would help me progress. probably like 20 minutes later the nurse came running in and was like that baby does not like pitocin! Her heart rate had dropped a little so they immediately took me off, but checked me and i was at 5. so it did help. after awhile i still wasn't really progressing so they put me on pitocin again. after about a half the nurse came running in again and was like ok no more pitocin!! Her heart rate had dropped again, so they put me on oxygen to get it to come back up and told me they were not going to put me on pitocin again. She checked me and i was at a 9!!! i went from a 5-9 in like a half hour!! all through out the day they kept telling me how much meconium i was leaking. Honestly, it had been something that i had really worried about through out my pregnancy because i knew i was probably going to go over, so i knew the odds of meconium were pretty good, but the doctor didn't seem concerned and said they would have team right there when the baby was born to help get all of it out of her lungs. by 2 o'clock i was at a 10. Doctor Jones decided to let me rest and descend for about an hour and then we would start pushing.
To keep it short i was still pushing after 2 hours!! Matt held one of my legs and counted through every contraction. i was seriously so exhausted from zero sleep that i could only count to 6 with out stopping! haha! i know, i know, everyone was making fun of me but i could seriously barely keep my eyes open! I did eventually get up to 10. haha! The whole time i was pushing everyone kept telling me how they could feel how much hair she had, which made me excited! They also kept commenting on how she was going to be a big baby. Most everyone guessed 9 pounds! Earlier in the day my regular doctor that i had been seeing for the last nine months called the hospital and said he would like to come and deliver the baby if i still hadn't had her by the time he was done with the clinic. Well i still hadn't had her so Dr. Bean showed up and i am so so so glad he did. It was so nice to have someone that we liked and were comfortable with be there with us. When he got there he pretty much gave me the pep talk of a life time! haha! He told me that i definitely had some things stacked against me, but he knew that i could do it! He told me that he would let me try pushing for another 30 minutes then he would assist me, but he didn't want to do a c-section because she was so low! Well after 30 minutes still nothing! So Dr. Bean helped me push for a little longer, i don't know exactly what he was doing but it felt like both of his hands were pretty much in my stomach and it was so so painful!! Matt was seriously so amazing through all of it, patiently and lovingly encouraging me every time i pushed and telling what a great job i was doing. Not too long after he told us he was going to be using one of those vacuum things (I'm not really sure what they are called) he explained how it would work and told me that i was still going to have to push really hard! Dr. Jones came back in and they also had some other nurses and someone from the nicu come in so they would be ready to get all of the meconium out of her lungs. Dr. Bean got his gown on and i knew that it was game time & she was finally coming!
After that everything happened really fast! I started to push as hard as i could and Dr. Bean was basically yelling at me telling me to keep going and didn't even let me have any breaks haha i was putting everything i had in me into those final pushes. i finally felt the head come out, the cord was around her neck and in a matter of seconds he did an episiotomy and cut the cord. i remember him telling matt he was sorry he didn't let him cut it. I felt her body come out and it was the weirdest but best feeling. They immediately took her over to the side and started putting tubes down her throat trying to drain out the meconium. It felt like it had been so long and she still wasn't crying. They told me they didn't want her to cry so they could get it all out. Then they called a code blue, i immediately burst into tears. it seemed like at least 10 more people came rushing into the room. They put a mask over her face to resesitate her. By that point it had been a really long time with out hearing her cry. I honestly have never been so scared in my whole life. I couldn't keep my emotions under control. Dr. Bean kept trying to talk to me while he was dilvering the after birth ( from what matt said my placenta was bright green from all the meconium. They asked me if i wanted to see it.. i said i was good haha) the nurses kept telling me that she was going to be ok, but i was still so scared. Matt was sitting next to me the whole time and i could tell he was scared too, but it was comforting having him next to me. After what felt like a good 1/2 hour (I'm not sure how long it really was) she finally started crying and it was the biggest relief! It was the sweetest sound i've ever heard! i think i started crying even harder. haha! When she started to cry matt went over by her side and watched as they drained more meconium out and cleaned her up a little bit. They took her over to the scale and weighed her at a whopping 8lbs 6oz then brought her over to me in a blanket and told me i could hold her for a few minutes but that they would need to take her down to the nursery and would probably need to start an IV. Holding her for the first time was the best thing ever! The feeling of love was incredible! As i looked down at her she didn't really look like i imagined.. honestly i didn't really know what to imagine. But she looked familiar, and so so beautiful!
i can't believe how swollen i got!
After a couple minutes matt went down with her to the nursery where they could evaluate her a little better. I was a little scared still not knowing if she was ok or not, but i was glad that matt was with her. After about 15 minutes a nurse came in and said, "good news, your baby is doing so good they are bringing her back up!" I was actually in shock, but so so happy! My mom and summer, and matt's parents came in as they brought her over to me. After awhile they left and it was just the 3 of us. I got to have some skin on skin and nurse her and it was amazing having that time to really look at her and know that she was our baby. i couldn't believe how much hair she had! Matt held her for a little while as well, and i'll never forget the way he held her and looked down at her with so much love. After about an hour they came to get her so they could give her a bath. After i got cleaned up a little bit they wheeled me down to our room. We passed her and matt in the nursery as they were giving her a bath and there was another little baby in there sleeping. I remember thinking that baby looks so tiny compared to mine! haha! They brought her into our room for a little while and we got some more one on one time, then i had them take her to the nursery for awhile so we could get some rest.
^she looks huge! haha!
The instant feeling of love i had for this little girl was indescribable! As silly as is sounds sometimes i will be holding her and get really emotional. Giving birth to her was a little bit of a traumatic experience and I'm just so grateful it all turned out and that she is ok! This little babe is already so so loved. I can't wait to watch her learn and grow and see her personality develop. I can already tell she is going to be extremely feisty! haha!
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